Gordon The Gopher Slept With Jimmy Savil?

Rumour has it that 

Gordon The Gopher Slept With Jimmy Savil?

Can this be true?

I Slept With Jimmy Savil

Gordon said Jimmys the last hand he ever felt before the BBC boxed him up in a store room with tape around his mouth...

Philip lost for words at the shocking news

This poor former bbc presenter suffered the indignity of being trapped in a box the last few years with the tellytubbies, although they had a stash of tubbie toast that got them through for a while...

In an interview sooty and sweep both share their distaste for the BBC and have always refused to leave iTv..

I should of took him with me to iTv

It makes one wonder who is safe.. who is next..

You think English is easy??

You think English is easy??

1) The bandage was wound around the wound.

2) The farm was used to produce produce.

3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

4) We must polish the Polish furniture..

5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.

6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert..

7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.

8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.

9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.

10) I did not object to the object.

11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.

12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

13) They were too close to the door to close it.

14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.

15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.

16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.

17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.

18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear..

19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.

20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Let’s face it – English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig..

And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.

PS. – Why doesn't ‘Buick’ rhyme with ‘quick’ ?

-LMAO!! ...PASS IT ON

Northampton Bar's Its Benches

Can you really believe this,,, Northampton Bar's Its Benches to stop the homeless sleeping on them
and not only that... look at the Spacing and the Height.... do they not realize just how many kids are going to kick them and snap them off?  I personally preferred it when kids just played with sticks..
and why two bars ? would you sit a baby between them or something?  i mean wtf
wonder how much council tax was spent on making and fitting those bars....

Bedroom Tax Songs (Lyrics)

feel free to make Song Suggestions in the "Comments"
If i no the song i  MIGHT  give it a go and edit the post to include it..

Here's some mini examples so far....


Pink Floyd - On The Turning Away
Atos lays in its claws...
to the weak and the helpless
the social closes its doors.. no more money for you..
they'd rather bail the banks out
and watch our country going down the spout
you can bet this will end in a war
while were dragged out our door

No more money to spare...
and yet they ride in their limo's
they have bimbos on tap.. reservation's at 6
they will still enjoy their party's..
they will still have 2 or 3 homes
as for you well you wont and you can't
coz they don't fkn care...

The Beatles - Eight Days A Week
Ooo i need my rent man..
We know you know its true...
but your not gona pay man...
So my time here is through...
Homeless...
Starving...
Can't even wash my cloths
So now im sleeping rough folks...
7 days a week...

7 days a week..
I don't get to eat..
7 days a week
I spend my days and nights on the streets
oo i need my rent man
so please stop fkn round...


Bob Dylan - Blowing In The Wind
come gather round people
and lend us your ears..
because this bedroom tax bullsh*t
makes genuine tears..
and it wont be that long till were all in the street
because they seam to like fkn us over..
so come grab a placard..
and stand ere and look ard
coz the times they are a changing...

come gather round people
where ever you roam
and lets knock this cameron guy
right from his thrown
hes attacking the poor while feeding the rich
and now we've all just become targets
were just middle class.. meant to take it up the...
and the tax oo how it pains me...
I guess it all depends what way ya wana take it
but anyone wants to sing something i can probs re-write it a number of ways like lmfao


Public Domain - The Battle Hymn of the Republic
My ears they heard this bullshit
Well i figured it can't be true 
That them tory nazis gona steal your home from you
Well I was wrong and so they have they ripped us from our homes 
And sacked off crisis loans

We recycle all our rubbish but yet we still pay
And they clearly sell the shit their paid to take away
Shouldn't it be cheaper rates recycling tins and glass
These fekers can kiss our ass

Tory tory partys nazis
Rippin off the week and helpless
Their the kinda fuckers who will kill the NHS
You no that targets next

Cameron he makes promises he knows he cannot keep
Someone needs to lay some eggs upon that fuckers beak
Why they've not been fkn burnt iz a mystery to me?
Because Shit doesn't burn so drown em at sea..


The Beatles - I Get By With A Little Help From My Friends
what would you do if your ass hit the street
and your whole life got flipped upside down..
would you kick off.. have a rant and a rave
or just send your self to the grave,
oo we'll get by when that asshole gets hung...



Johnny Cash - Folsom Prison Blues
I hear the bailiffs commin..
smashing through my door
8 seconds later i was handcuffed on the floor
coz i had an extra bedroom
So i just had to go..
and now im in the gutter..
like every other joe  : /


Melvin Endsley - I Never Felt More Like Singing The Blues
I never felt more like singing the blues
I never thought... that ide ever loose my home...
because it had 2 rooms...
now im living on the kerb..
no food or heat... what a nerve...
camreon just yeah doesn't care
ooooo lol


The Beatles - Norwegian Wood
I once had a flat... but they all said... it was to big...
All night poked in the back.. by my new bed..
because Its made out of twigs
I had a home.. yet now... i live with the tramps
all so our leaders... could help... bail out the banks...


Public Domain - Johnny Comes Marching Home
cameron has been here before.. was her.. that maggie... that maggie
he seams just the same and gives us the..  pain.. that maggie.. that maggie
camerons just a nob.. needs to get a real job..
and just leave us alone... to get on with a lives
and its just so wrong...
what the governments doing here... 


Public Domain - Ghost Riders In The Sky
When they rolled in the bedroom tax... we began to cry
but the last thing we expected... was for people to die
this madness needs to end today.. or Liverpool it will fall
this is an atrocity.. this government is fkn us all

camerons pulling money that's meant to pay our rent
and all the bullshit budget figures.. the whole systems fkn bent
wont be long till were all out with no where else to live
Stripped away our funding.. leaving nothing left to give...


Public Domain - We Shall Not Be Moved
we wont take your crap no more,we shall not be moved
we wont pay this tax no more, and we wont be screwd
this whole systems wrong and we are sick of taking this
Camerons just a useless ass who clearly takes the piss : /
im not to up on the whole melody of that one


Pink Floyd - Another Brick In The Wall Part 1
We don't need that Cameron ass-ole...
We don't need  bullsht from the dole...
This country.. just needs some real.. Jobs...
And a lot less hassle.. from these god dam nobs..
hey.. sht bags.. pay my fucking rent....
coz if you don't... your gona.. get a brick from my wall...
ooo or a might use two.. Just to sandwich ya balls...


Public Domain - Any Old Iron
any old iron.. any old iron, any any any old iron..
I need some rent coz the governments bent,
the budgets spent and they blew my rent...

Bob wrote these... took him 10 mins to provide them all.. so erm.. round of applause :P

George Carlin Who Really Controls America

George Carlin Who Really Controls America OR The UK

(embedding was disabled, so you have to use the link)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYIC0eZYEtI

George Carlin on Our Similarities

George Carlin on Our Similarities

(embedding was disabled, so you have to use the link)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgps85scy1g

 

 

George Carlin The American Dream

George Carlin ~ The American Dream

He Always Says It How It Is....